Bumper Stickers

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
Before you condemn someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
We must silence those who oppose freedom of speech.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
You are right where you belong. Behind me.
Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.
Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
Don't play stupid with me. I'm better at it.
Was today really necessary?
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
Just because people don't understand you doesn't make you an artist.
Love is grand. Divorce is fifty grand.
There are two important things to remember about surrealism. Frogs, power tools, and the Lincoln Memorial.
I came here with nothing, and I still have most of it.
Even if you win the rat race, you're still a rat.
Pass carefully. Driver chews tobacco.
O.K., I take it back. Unscrew you.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
I wasn't born a bitch. Men like you made me this way.
Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
Better living through denial.